In my last blog (also taken from my latest book, “Heartgasm!”) we
talked about taking 100% responsibility for your life and how that can give you
ownership of your own life.
Taking responsibility for even your unconscious patterns
allows you to own that you are sending out signals attracting matching
vibrations, good or bad.
If you are responsible, not your parents, your mate, or
anyone else, you can start choosing which signals you want to sent out and that
is where we now begin…
Your Cherished Union
CAN Be Heaven on Earth
Your Heart’s Unspoken Desire: Finding Relationship Heaven
What
does having heaven in your relationship mean to you? What does it look
like? How many times a day do you say “If only it were
this way?” “If only it were that way?” “Things would be so much better if....” So
much of what I used to wish for in my early relationships had to do with “If
only the other person would....” “If only my mate were this way or that way.”
It was a surprise to
me to find out that it was probably not the other person that had to change,
but myself.
I
didn’t think I asked for the life I was getting, but according to the “Law of
Attraction,” on some level I did. I found out that life doesn’t just “happen to
you” – you beam it in, exactly according to your expectations and patterns.
John Lennon noticed
that life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans. I wonder if he
learned, as I did, that life is a reflection of our deepest sub-conscious
thoughts through the law of attraction.
You might call the law
of attraction the ABC’s of quantum physics, and according to this law, the
vibration that emanates from you attracts or brings in, a similar or
complimentary vibration. So what I was beaming out from myself is what I ended
up attracting.
This is why the person
I needed to change was me! What I learned from my first metaphysical
teachers, Joel and Dr. Champion Teutsch, is that if you change yourself, then your
partner will shift accordingly. Abraham-Hicks, another metaphysical teacher,
calls this finding a vibrational match. The energy we emit from our inner core
can be perceived as a vibration and like-vibrations attract.
By
stepping out of the little box in which I had lived my life, I could begin to see
that, although the universe is infinite, like an infinity ribbon, it always
comes back around to its origin. Whether I thought this was fair or not, the
universe was always bringing analogous people, situations, things, and
a life that I had “vibrationally” asked for, back into my field.
Unless
you are making conscious
shifts in
your thinking and perceptions, you may not feel you are in control of your
own life. I definitely did not feel in control.
It was a hard lesson
for me to adsorb, that when you consciously shift your vibrational field, the
people around you must shift or split away. Why? If that shift feels too uncomfortable
for your partner (because their patterns will necessarily have to change to reflect
your new vibration), that person may not be enough in “resonance” with you, and
will have no choice but to go a different direction. It was
through my two back-to-back marriages that I got this realization big time.
My Two Completely Different Husbands and How They’re Being
Around Me Turned Them Into Raging Maniacs
In my first marriage,
I used to cry myself to sleep at night because the little amount of sex we had
in the beginning of our relationship had dwindled down to nothing. The last
vestiges of communication fluctuated between being ignored and being verbally
abused. Eventually, no sex was the outcome of no communication.
Interestingly
enough, my second marriage, even though my next husband was completely different, turned
out almost exactly like the first one. I had the realization that if I had the
same outcome from both seven-year marriages, that it probably was not about
them, but something about me that attracted the same outcome. What signal or
vibration was I putting out to be treated like this – to be put down, verbally
abused, and not heard?
Hmmm, this sounded
familiar – so it wasn’t too hard to figure out. By that time I’d had years of
studying with my mentors, the Teutschs, and knew that almost all negative
patterns come from our parents. There was no doubt that since my father treated
me like this, (put me down, verbally abused me, and wouldn’t listen to what I
had to say) that I had attracted men who loved me so much that they gave me
exactly what I was unconsciously asking for. How scary was that?
Right after I finished this blog, I found the above synchronisticly-scary photo in the appendix of Ken Rochon’s book, “Becoming the
Perfect Networker.”
If this seems scary to you too, then it will be totally
appropriate to find out how to start correcting your vibrational signals so you
bring in what you really want, which, believe it or not, is what ScaryGuy is
about, only he uses different words.
In my next blog, we’ll segue right into “Dismantling Bastions of
Unconscious Patterns, Expectations, and Beliefs.”
•¤****¤• Just a few reminders about ways we can keep in touch •¤****¤•
First I’d love for guests to post on my blog and invite comments for the next few weeks. Have any
of you ever wondered why unwanted situations happen to you? I’d love to know how my story resonates
with you — any similar experiences or outcomes?
Anyone
who posts relevant comments on my blog for the next few weeks will get a BIG
bonus: You’ll be eligible for one hour of free coaching on a call or a Skype
call. Be sure to leave your name
and contact info so I can reach you to set up an appointment.
Now is a great time
to take advantage of some enticing freebies
by registering on my Website Http://www.ToniDeMarco.com
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Thanks and see you next time,
Toni